only if we run a train.
done.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
