i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
