i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
