If i come over, it means nothing
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
