Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
