Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
