I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Success! We fucked roommates!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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