Just mADE A PArabola og urine
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
