**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
