doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
