Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
