the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize