Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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