Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
