: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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