I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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