When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
