He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
