his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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