butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
