this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
