It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
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