well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
