My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
