you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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