gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
