it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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