She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
