i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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