I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
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You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
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The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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