she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize