I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
