farters have to be the big spoon...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
