i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
