in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize