Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
