I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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