I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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