I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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