awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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