I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
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