fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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