you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize