you would pick up someone in the library
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You are a genius and a whore.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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