I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize