At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize