scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
it hurts more in the daytime
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize