My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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