they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
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This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
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My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram