Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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