I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
